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Ever since Alyssa woke, she had hardly left Jasper's side, forsaking sleep and rest with no regard for her own health.
Three more days dragged by, though for her, it felt like months-years-decades.
The tthat passed was agonizing.
This wasn't the first tJasper had been hurt because of her. She had been through the fear and panic before, when his life hung by a thread or when he lay in a deepa. Yet, this twas different. For reasons she couldn't understand, the calm and rationality she once had had vanished.
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtShe gripped his hand tightly, her fingers woven with his. Fear surged through her like an avalanche, threatening to drown her from the inside.
This was a fear that she had never felt.
That intense helplessness tormented her mentally every second of the day.
In just one week, Alyssa, once proud and radiant, had withered like a pale white rose. She was gaunt, fragile, and exhausted.
Her hospital gown looked so big on her emaciated frthat it looked like it was swallowing her.
Each day, from morning until night, she spoke to Jasper about their past. She shared stories from when she was 11 to 18, of their marriage, their divorce, and their eventual reconciliation. She remembered every heart-stopping moment with perfect clarity. There were happy times, sad times, tears of joy.
And now, all those memories, once too painful to revisit, seemed insignificant inparison.
As long as she remembered him, everything was well. She had no right to ask for more.
"Jasper... Jul said that there is sissue with your brain. I'm really scared. I'm afraid that you will etwhen you wake up." Alyssa picked up Jasper's calloused hand and interlaced her fingers with his. With tears streaming down her face, she planted kisses all over his fingertips, the back of his hand, and his palm.
During their most intimate moments, Jasper had often said she was like a tender piece of meat, tempting him with every bite. He would shower her skin with kisses, leaving her trembling in ecstasy before bringing her to an even higher peak. In public, their affection was more restrained. He would kiss her fingers, her palms-just like this.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmHe loved her too deeply. His constant kisses were simply his way of showing his love, of not knowing how to express it any other way.
He didn't know what to do with himself physically and emotionally.
Now, it was her turn to be vulnerable, her turn to taste the fear of losing him.
Indeed, God was just. Those who failed to appreciate what they had would eventually be punished.
"Okay, it's alright... It's alright even if you et me." Alyssa's tears fell continuously onto his palm. "If you have to etto get through this safely... I'm okay with my disappearing from your memories. I will have no regrets. As long as I can watch over you for the rest of my life, I will be satisfied..." Jasper had uttered the swords countless times.
This time, it was Alyssa's turn to say it. Every word was like a jagged stone cutting across her heart repeatedly.
Would she really be satisfied? Wasn't this just a moment of self-consolation after she had exhausted all her efforts andpromised, only to find that she waspletely helpless? "Don't et me... please... Don't et me..." In the end, Alyssa couldn't lie to herself anymore. She leaned against his chest, her shoulders shaking as silent sobs wracked her body.
"Lyse, don't cry."