Headed by a Snake

"This is a sick joke, Leserre." Clemont shook his head, "Let's leave."

Clemont took a few steps away before turning back, "Are you coming?"

"I'm not."

Clemont stared at the strong back of Emilien Leserre. The man stood, tall and defiant.

Leserre spoke without turning, "All my life, Clemont, I have been waiting for this challenge... It was made for me... for one of my specific set of skills."

"Emilien..." Clemont found his voice stuck in his throat. He wanted to argue, but he knew his simple and honest friend had already made up his mind.

Slowly, the knight turned his face, revealing tears running down his strong cheeks and into the white patches of his beard, "Soon, I will grow too old to properly run an obstacle course. This is... the last time I'll be able to give it my all."

"Fu fu fu fu!!" The lithe Sorina cackled, "It will certainly be your last-- IF YOU DIE! FU FU FU FUUUU!!!"

"This hardly sounds legal," Clemont remarked.

"You must sign a liability waiver if you wish to take part-- FU FU FU FU FU!!!"

Leserre crossed his arms, nodding powerfully, "I will complete this mission, on my honor as the leader of Guild Staghorn and as a Knight of the Kingdom..."

He smirked derisively, "Nay... I will do this on my honor as Emilien Leserre."

...

[Obstacle One: Balance Logs]

An array of logs was arranged for course-goers to balance or climb across.

Leserre had already gotten to the end, "Come on, Wizard! Chop chop!"

"This... this isn't so bad." Clemont pursed his lips, "Maybe I've been overreacting."

[Obstacle Four: Burning Razor Wire]

"CRAAWWWLLLLL, MAGGOTS!" Sorina Capulet roared, "CRAWL AS IF YOUR LIVES DEPEND ON IIIIIT!!!"

Clemont crawled on his hands and knees as fast as he could through mud and slop. Burning flames lit on thin wires with razor-sharp barbs dangled overhead while the yelps of rabid possums threatened to bite at their heels, "I take it back! I take it all back! I wasn't overreacting!!"

Leserre stood at the end, throwing rocks behind Clemont, assumedly at the possums, "Come on, Wizard! Almost there!!"

[Obstacle Six: Warped Wall]

Clemont was doubled over, trying to catch his breath, "So it's... it's just a strangely shaped wall?"

Emilien frowned, chopping his hand forward dramatically, "It's not just ANY strangely shaped wall... it's the WARPED WALL-- a staple of obstacle courses in the Kingdom, since--"

"Spare me, Emilien," Clemont waved his staff, enchanting his boots with magic, "Jump."

With a short sprint, Wizard Clemont easily leapt to the top of the wall, pulling himself onto the ledge.

Leserre pursed his lips and started taking off his armor.

[Obstacle Nine: Precipice of Doom]

Clemont and Leserre came across two ledges. The left ledge was thinner and curvier, while the right appeared to take longer.

The armor-less, tunic and underwear-wearing Leserre nodded, "I shall choose the left path!"

"Wait, what? Why?" Clemont asked. The choice seemed illogical.

"I'm here to challenge myself, Clemont! The right path won't do!" Leserre insisted.

Clemont shrugged. He began edging carefully along the right path, taking care not to look down. The 20-fulm fall into the dirt wouldn't be pleasant. The only thing he had to worry about was an odd curve around a wall.

Turning the corner, Clemont found a red-haired woman on the other side. He narrowed his eyes. She looked remarkably familiar-- like Seldin Korr, the Unbreakable, but with vibrant, crimson hair.

"...Miss... Korr?"

"Oh, it's the mage."

Korr punched Clemont in the face, forcing him off the precipice and sending him tumbling to the dirt below, "WHHHHHHYYY!"

[Obstacle Ten: Corrosive Arrow Barrage]

[Obstacle Eleven: Trap Path]

[Obstacle Twelve: Knights of the Round]

[Obstacle Thirteen: Knights of the Round, Electric Boogaloo]

[Obstacle Fifteen: Stairs of Heavenly Weight]

[Obstacle Seventeen: Trap Path 2 (Electric Boogaloo)]

[Obstacle Eighteen: Trigonometry Cumulative Final]

[Obstacle Nineteen: Trigger-nometry Cumulative Final]

Clemont walked along with Sorina Capulet. He had been eliminated, but spoke with Sorina amicably, "How many... obstacles are there?"

"Just twenty-four." Sorina responded, "Korr and I had designed over 70, but we don't have the technology to make things like the Seven-Star-Slaughter Formation and the Rasengan Sphere.

"And... why exactly is Korr the Unbreakable actively opposing Knight Leserre's progress?"

"Ehehe..." Sorina chuckled with chagrin, "She was supposed to show course-goers how to complete the obstacles... but I think she decided on her own that she would do better as an obstacle, herself. Oh, and that's the 25th obstacle. It's just a fight with Korr."

"I... see." Clemont grimaced, "So is there really a contract, Miss Sorina?"

"Uh huh!" Sorina nodded, "Miss Maeva Leserre, the coordinator of our Merylsward branch, recommended your guild. Would you guys be interested in being hired directly by House Charm as we expand our trade to the surrounding major cities?"

"Err..." Clemont furrowed his brows, "We are interested. But... is that all? Did you want to test us or our men? --Hold on, are you meaning to tell me it wasn't necessary to take part in the course?"

Sorina tilted her head, handing Clemont a rolled-up scroll, "We've done our research, Master Wizard. This is a draft of your guild's contract. There are a few rules of professionalism and conduct that you will be responsible to follow-- everything legal.

Clemont unfurled the scroll and glanced over the contract before shaking his head, "These terms are far too good, Miss Sorina. I still cannot believe that Guild Staghorn is deserving of them, with our recent failures."

The merchant girl placed a hand on her mouth to stifle a giggle, "Ehihihi. Well, about that, our employer is somewhat esoteric. Baron Tycondrius of Guild Invictus has judged the moral qualities of both you and Knight Leserre to be worthy of employment."

The wizard widened his eyes, his jaw slackened, "Baron Tycondrius did?"

Sol Invictus was a small guild, but their reputation was matchless, and many of their members supremely powerful. Staghorn was in such dire straits because they had taken a time-sensitive quest to hunt Invictus. They hadn't had the time to research their reputation, mostly from their deeds in the Holy Country, nor their backing, which included Princess Aurala.

Clemont took in a deep breath, "Very well. I have no issues with the contract. Does... Leserre need to complete the obstacle course?"

The two looked back-- Korr and Leserre were dueling with flaming swords on a raised platform while a trio of guards threw burning pitch-covered handaxes at them. Leserre's underwear was particularly eye-catching.

"My completion of the obstacle course will NOT be stopped by you, woman! Your title as Unbreakable will be lost on THIS SUN!!" Leserre roared.

"You will FAIL as ALL OTHERS BEFORE YOU!! I am ETERNAL!! My power, INFINITE!!" Korr screamed back.

Sorina shrugged, "He does not... but look how much fun he's having."

Clemont sighed and offered a relieved smile, "Indeed."