I'm Not Going to Be Bullied By a Girl

Here’s one of the reasons why I went to Jianren Monastery in the West District with Fang Xin:

Ever since the Seven Heroes of Dong Shan escaped from the Dong Shan Mental Hospital, the hospital, once regarded by Fang Xin as a sanctuary for meditation, had changed.

The increase in guards and patrols didn’t mean much to Fang Xin. What mattered the most was that the severely ill patients were separated from each other and confined separately. The distance between wards increased from 5 meters to 50 meters, with multiple checkpoints in between to prevent patients from “connecting”.

Fang Xin always believed that the ravings of a mental patient was the best white noise. Now, it has become a luxury, which was a source of frustration for Fang Xin.

After the Seven Heroes of Dong Shan stormed 28 Middle, the white suit leader was transferred to another hospital, and the others were monitored to varying degrees. Also, Fang Xin no longer had any challengers in the mental hospital. Although he was completely inadequate, it was better than nothing. Now, it was just boring.

Since the mental hospital no longer served as inspiration for his thoughts, Fang Xin decided it was pointless to stay any longer. He contacted his father, Professor Bai, and arranged for him to be discharged. Since he wasn’t a manic type, and was judged to pose almost no harm to society, the director easily released him.

After his discharge, Fang Xin didn’t spend most of his time preaching at Happy Science as a ‘great sage’. Instead, he dressed like he was retired and strolled around lakes and rivers with his hands behind his back while contemplating the universe amidst the picturesque scenery.

On Saturday, he suddenly found me on a whim and asked me to accompany him to Jianren Monastery. He said he wanted to prove the superiority of the teachings of Happy Science to me.

Are you trying to claim that the cult you’ve created is superior to Buddhism? How shameless! Buddhism has at least accumulated wisdom from thousands of years of experience…

However, I overlooked one point: it didn’t matter if you went to famous mountains and rivers or humble abodes, the number of enlightened monks and practitioners nowadays were as rare as giant pandas. Jianren Monastery charges exorbitant entrance fees and it’s double the price on holidays, so let alone having any monks, there probably weren’t even many true Buddhist believers.

The reason I agreed to go to Jianren Monastery with Fang Xin was quite complex.

First, I needed to cultivate a good relationship with Fang Xin, the true leader of Happy Science, to get closer to the calculation program and complete the deal with Ai ShuQiao.

Second, I was curious if Fang Xin, the self-proclaimed god who was now reduced to the leader of a cult, would feel embarrassed when he sees me.

Furthermore, it’s not like Fang Xin insisted that I had to go. Gong CaiCai was randomly selected as the great sage’s attendant. She was super excited about the opportunity and felt that she was one step closer to fulfilling her wish. To prevent Gong CaiCai’s worldview from being damaged any further, I decided to accompany Fang Xin and Gong CaiCai to visit Jianren Monastery. I could use the religious knowledge my dad imparted to me at the dinner table to counter Fang Xin’s fallacies.

Normally, it would be appropriate for me to call Xiao Qin to join me on these occasions, but Auntie Ren took her to attend her uncle’s birthday party and she couldn’t get away.

So, the cult leader Fang Xin, along with me and Gong CaiCai, the two cult followers, entered the grand gate of Jianren Monastery.

Jianren Monastery had the meaning of ‘a wise man sees wisdom, a benevolent man sees benevolence’. While the name was steeped in ancient meaning and was often jokingly referred to as ‘Bitch Temple’ with people saying that all the monks were bitches.

“Fang, Mr. Fang!”

After we met up at the gate of the temple, Gong CaiCai talked to Fang Xin very nervously. Professor Bai had told him in advance that their internal titles such as ‘Great Sage’ should not be used indiscriminately outside. She only needed to address the cult leader as Mr. Fang.

“Pretty good.” Fang Xin still had his hands behind his back as he glanced down at Gong CaiCai with his two light-colored eyes without any kindness or malice, “You have a pure mind and aren’t stained by the mortal world. The calculation program chose you as my escort and it can really contrast the ugliness of those fake monks.”

Gong CaiCai, who was praised in person, immediately blushed, “I, I just want to gain some wisdom around Mr. Fang. The monks in Jianren Monastery aren’t really bad people, right? Although the tickets are a bit expensive…”Thᴇ link to the origɪn of this information rᴇsts ɪn ɴo(v)elꜰɪre.ɴet

Come on! If even a rich person like you thinks the tickets are expensive, then how will everyone else think? The temple was basically a cash cow for the monks to make more money!

To my surprise, Fang Xin took Gong CaiCai and I into the monastery directly. After announcing our names, they didn’t even charge us for admission. The gatekeeper monk even addressed Fang Xin as ‘Fang householder’. So Fang Xin was someone who had a reputation in the Buddhist community and can visit monasteries across the country easily.

“These people are blind!” I complained quietly as I followed Fang Xin onto the stone floor of the monastery, “You may have started by studying Buddhism, but ended up setting up a new branch and creating a cult like Happy Science. You should be declared a traitor in the Buddhist world and executed!”

Gong CaiCai quickly explained for Fang Xin: “Happy Science isn’t a religon! Also Ye Lin classmate should stop saying something so barbaric like executions…”

“Haha, actually Buddhism isn’t necessarily a religion either.” Fang Xin said calmly while looking at the clouds in the sky calmly, “In the United States, many Christians also embrace Buddhist ideals and consider it as a way of life. The thoughts expressed in the New Testament of Christianity bear many similarities to Buddhism and there are even rumors that Jesus himself was a Buddhist.”

I grabbed Fang Xin’s arm and pulled him aside slightly and asked, “Didn’t you claim to be a god in front of me? How come you’re acting normal now in front of Gong CaiCai?”

Fang Xin smiled lightly, “I am merely a vessel for the divine. Sometimes, the god within me leaves to observe the world and you’ll know when he returns.”

I smirked, “Is your god named Naru? It seems to be quite trendy these days to harbor something else in your body. After all, isn’t Naruto also hosting a Nine-Tailed Fox inside him…”

It was the weekend today, so despite the expensive tickets at Jianren Monastery, it still attracted many people to come burn incense and worship Buddha, mostly middle-aged people and the elderly.

Gong Caicai wore a relatively simple outfit for today’s itinerary. A light yellow silk blouse paired with a pleated skirt. The small jacket outside her blouse covered her chest as if it was necessary for her to show respect to Buddha.

“Mr. Fang, I don’t understand…” Gong CaiCai was eager to learn and said, “Buddhism has so many gods like the Tathagata Buddha and Guanyin Bodhisattva, so why do you say it’s not a religion?”

At this point, Fang Xin finally brought his hands out from behind his back.

“Cai Cai, you’ve made a mistake. The Tathagata Buddha, also known as Shakyamuni, does not belong to the category of gods, but is rather on the level of a sage like Confucius. The title ‘Shakyamuni’ translates to ‘the sage of the Shakyas,’ and ‘Buddha’ means ‘awakened one.’ Those who truly understand Buddhism do not consider Shakyamuni as a god; he was just Siddhartha Gautama, a prince of Kapilavastu, who became an enlightened sage who was concerned about the world.”

To prevent Fang Xin from completely dominating the conversation, I interrupted:

“I know about Guanyin! She was based on the Ashvinis in Vedism! After Buddhism was established, it incorporated the Ashvinis into its system and called them ‘Avalokitesvara’! At that time, Avalokitesvara was still depicted as male! However, the Chinese felt that entrusting the task of childbirth to a man might imply cuckoldry, so they changed Avalokitesvara to a female!”

After spouting off a bunch of religious trivia, my nose had grown longer like Pinocchio’s. These obscure facts about religion weren’t something most people would hear from their fathers at the dinner table.

“Du… Dual horse toilets?” A seemingly 18-year-old novice monk squinted as he overheard fragments of our conversation as he passed by. Then, he exclaimed in surprise, “Guanyin was actually based on a toilet god?”

Damn! If you lack knowledge about Buddhism, then don’t become a monk! The dual horse-headed deities are twin brothers, not a pair of toilets! Are you not afraid of divine retribution for slandering the Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva like that?

“Well said, Ye Lin, your knowledge is quite extensive.” Fang Xin nodded. “The dual horse-headed deities are traditional benevolent gods in Vedism. Legend has it that they possess great divine power. They are able to restore sight to the blind, make bulls produce milk, and make withered trees blossom…”

Hey! The blind and withered trees may benefit from this divine power, but did this god bother to ask the bull for its opinion? If I suddenly started producing milk, I definitely wouldn’t be pleased!

Gong CaiCai, who had simply wanted to bow to the statue of Guanyin in the temple’s side hall, hesitated after hearing Fang Xin’s words. I’m not sure if it was because the dual horse-headed deities, enjoyed making bulls produce milk which contradicted her wishes.

“May my husband’s illness be cured soon…”

An elderly woman with snowy white hair was on a cushion and sincerely praying to the seven-foot golden statue of Guanyin Bodhisattva.

Unexpectedly, a fierce-looking monk rudely tapped on the redwood box in front of the Guanyin —— a box that often contained large denominations of currency.

“Hey! I don’t mean to disrespect your age, but didn’t you use your own incense instead of buying our temple’s premium incense earlier? That’s against the rules! If you come to worship Guanyin without offering any money for incense, then it won’t bring you any blessings!”

“B-b-but.” the old woman awkwardly reached into her pocket, “I used all the money I brought to buy the entrance ticket, and I still need to eat lunch later…”

After I saw the greedy monk, who seemed to only care about money, I couldn’t help but feel that the nickname “Bitch Monastery” wasn’t unjustified. It’s unfortunate that there are always kind-hearted believers who are misled by propaganda and mistakenly believe that this place has a long history, so they rush here to burn incense and worship Buddha whenever they get the chance.

A long history my ass! The real Jianren Monastery was demolished during the Cultural Revolution! I’ve even seen historical photos from that time showing monks being forced to hold banners with slogans like “Buddhist scriptures are nonsense!”. The current Jianren Monastery was rebuilt about a kilometer away from the original site! It’s not even the same monastery as before, and the monks aren’t the same monks! There’s absolutely no connection to its original long history!

“Please… please don’t make it difficult for the old lady…” Gong CaiCai took out ¥50 from her wallet and dropped it into the donation box while timidly speaking to the fierce monk, “Let the old lady worship the Bodhisattva quietly.”

If she were alone, even with all the courage in the world, Gong CaiCai wouldn’t dare to interfere. But with Fang Xin and me here, Gong CaiCai finally summoned a bit of courage despite the monk’s status.