MY Possessive Mafia Men

Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness Angelia

For a second day in a row, | skipped both school and work. It was easier skipping school but I felt terrible

knowing someone else had to cover my shift. Still, | needed tto sort things out and my emotions were still all

over the place. It exhaustedand | had to take care of myself before | added more to my plate. On a bright

note, | actually got around to figuring out my next step yesterday like | had planned to.

It was hard because the next step wasn't something | was ready for but something | still needed to do. | needed

answers and to get them, | had to talk to them. These past days made it clear that if | didn't speak to them, |

would never truly move past it because | would always wonder why. It was the single most hardest choice | had

made to grow up. When | was a kid, | thought that people over eighteen were adults but the older I got, the more

| learned that it had nothing to do with

age and all to do with how you acted and how you handled difficult situations. | had always | becoming an adult

because mature decision s**d a** no matter how beneficial they could be could be

dreaded

When Andy got back yesterday from picking up my stuff, he had toldabout Riccardo showing

up and then Marshall. It hurt to hear about them but at the stime, it gavehope that some

of what we had was genuine. | mean, they must have cared at least a little if they were trying to seekout,

right? Abandoning Andy and James at the dinner table, | walked to the room for privacy. Sitting down on the bed,

| finally turned off the flight mode on the phone. | had avoided my phone like the plague but it was tto get

my a*** in gear and deal because if it was one thing | hadn't done these past days, it was dealing with the shit

that had happened. Instead, | had fully succumbed to wallowing in self-pity so much so that Andy had sent James

over while he was at work just so | couldn't wallow too much. The joke was on him, James had brought a shit ton

of

ice cream and we watched smovies. The saddest movie ever made in my opinion and we cried together and

if that wasn't the height of wallowing, | didn't know what was.

1

My heart stuttered in my chest as notification ticked in on my phone. Ldidn't know what | had expected but the

overwhelming amount of both texts and missed wasn't it. Going for the easiest first, | clicked on the missed calls

and scrolled down, seeing all the guys even Kingston who despised talking had called several times. The last call

was just a few minutes ago from Marshall. | almost felt nauseous as | went to the texts next, choosing to read

Riccardo's first since he had been the one who textedlast and scrolled up to read the oldest text first.

'I tried calling back but you didn't answer. Marshall told me, we will figure it out, my bunny. We will find a way to

make it work, | promise. Callwhen you can.' 1/4 Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness

His first message gutted me, had he ever planned on tellingthe truth? Or would he have just continued to lie

if I hadn't found out? Marshall toldbut you already know. Maybe not that | had been his student but he had

known there could be a possibility at the very least.

[I

'l am starting to worry, please givea call." And then | read his third message. 'Lam

| am so sorry. Whenever you are ready, we will be waiting. We are not giving up on us.' Us? Was there even an us

any longer? The thought that we weren't brokefurther and | didn't know what | wanted, only that | didn't

want to feel like this, a mix of too many negative emotions that | couldn't discern one from the other. Scrolling

down his newest text, | saw that it was sent an hour ago.

'You were the best thing to happen to us, we knew it the second we saw you. | was just too greedy to let you

walk away before we had a chance to see where this could go.’

Tears welled in my eyes as | read his message, | was surprised | even had the capability for more tears after all

the crying | had done. My period which | had just gotten yesterday made my emotions go from chaotic enough to

complete haywire. | wasn't ready to read the texts from the other, not after how shitty | felt after reading

Riccardo's but it needed to be done. It was basically like pouring alcohol into a wound, it might hurt but it would

keep the wound from festering. Marshall was right under Riccardo's and I clicked on it. Doing the swith him,

| scrolled up and read from the oldest to the newest.

'We well idiots, completely and fucking idiots. It painsto know that we were causing you to hurt and | can

never apologize enough for it, please give us a chance to explain."

How many opportunities had they had to cclean? Too many and yet they hadn't. If they had toldin the

beginning, maybe...maybe | would have been more inclined to forgive them. Now that feelings were involved, it

was much harder to overlook what they had done.

'l drove by the restaurant today where we were on our date and | was thinking of you. | am always thinking

about you, forgive me, baby girl."

laro

A few tears dropped onto my screen and | wiped it away as | kept reading further.

"The moment | saw you in my class, | never cared about you being my student. You are worth the risk, you are

worth everything." My heart couldn't take this and yet | didn't stop reading.

| am happy you have Andy, | know he will take care of you like we should have done. | am sorry."

|

My thumb hesitated over Kingston's message, | was afraid of what he had to say because when a man used as

few words as him, he chose them with the intent to get the message across. What

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Chapter 148: You Brightened My Darkness.

message has Kingston for me? Stealing myself, | clicked on his name, | started to scroll up like | had done with

the others, only to realize there weren't multiple texts.

"There is much | regret when it comes to you. The first one is that we never told you the whole truth, we were

selfish but what I have cto realize was that we were also scared. We were scared because, for once, we had

something we truly needed: a bond with someone who glued us all together, making us whole in a way we never

were before you and we were scared to lose that.' A tear dropped from my eyes. "The second | thing | regret is

how I never let you see the happiness | felt when you were near. Being happy is foreign toand again | grew

scared because happiness was never meant forbut somehow, you still madefeel it and experience it.

Your light brightened my darkness."

| had to | to press my hand to my mouth to keep the sobs quiet. It felt like my heart was getting torn apart, their

messages were sharp edges and cutopen. "The third thing is that | never shared with you my thoughts about

you and you deserve to know each and every one of it. | think about how I like the way you talk towith a

whisper to match my own. | think about your smile that lights up my heart and I think about how beautiful | you

are inside and out. | think about how much I love sharing my kitchen with you, cooking with you side by side.

And lastly, I think you fit perfectly, like the last piece of the puzzle we needed to make us complete. We were

incomplete with you, my pumpkin. Please, cback to us." (1 Their words

were like a vice squeezing my heart, | felt the truth in them which tolda lot about. the faith I still had in these

men. A piece ofknew that they hadn't meant to hurtbut the truth of the matter was they still did. Trust

was a fickle thing, wasn't it? It was a bond that when kept, was the strongest bond of all. It preceded love, you

couldn't have love without the foundation of trust but when that trust was broken, it would never be as strong

again. You could try to rebuild it and through the years, it might becclose to what you had before but there

would always be a crack there that would never truly heal. But sometime, that bond was still worth fighting for, |

just needed to figure out if that applied to us. Knowing what | needed to do next, | sent a message to Marshall,

telling him to meet up withat the park. | would send one to Riccardo and Kingston too. | figured it might be

easier forto see them one on one than all of them at once. It would have been too much for my fragile heart.

It was about twe had a talk and forto get answers.