Villain of my own novel

"Graa!!!???" I roared, clenched my head and screamed in anguish. I could feel my eyes burn, slowly my vision faded as if something was covering my vision without my consent, in an instant my vision turned black and I couldn't even do anything because my mana was almost depleted and it hurt when I tried to circulate it.

WHOOOSH

Again, my consciousness was dragged somewhere forcibly, and it didn't take a long time for me to arrive in pitch black space where I neither felt comfortable not did I feel uncomfortable... I was just...there.

[??? (Cursed) activating...]

[ERROR!]

***

'What's going on?' I looked around.... Or so I tried but I couldn't move my body even by an inch.

'!'

'I' slowly opened my eyes and stared at humans being eaten, ripped apart, stomped on, and pierced through, then 'my' eyes met the monster's, I grinned and braced myself for a fight, and I felt 'my' legs shiver in fear(?)...

'What?' I muttered in my mind.

'My' body shivered in fear, and I was terrified for my life, which was feeling that had been numbed long-long ago. My body simply continued to shiver at the sight of a mere goblin closing in with a grin on his face, my whole body trembled as 'I' began to sweat profusely, perhaps because of the amount of fear 'I' was feeling, my body moved, jerked back before beginning to crawl back in fear.

SLIT

"Urg!?" 'I' groaned in pain and noticed that a wide vertical cut appeared on right forearm because of a broken rock's sharp end which was poking out in my direction.

I ignored the pain because the fear I was experiencing was more overwhelming, grabbed the rock, and pointed at the goblin with shivering hands, but the goblin had begun to dash at me while human blood poured out from its mouth.

It held the dagger like a sword and dashed at me while roaring, and in fear, I pushed the rock out at the goblin, and because of the speed it was moving at, it couldn't dodge and died with the rock piercing its neck.

[Awakening condition met...]

[Initializing 'System' ....]

THROB

***

'My' head throbbed and my consciousness was suddenly dragged back out from 'my' body.

'What's going on? Where is this? Where was I just a second ago? I don't have any recollection of being that pathetic in front a mere goblin, but... Why did it feel so vivid?' I tried to figure out what was going on, but I was dragged back to the pitch-black space before I could think of anything else. I began to ponder what had just happened after I returned to the black space, until....

DING

[Trait: ??? (Cursed) Activated.]

[Party member 'Quinn Walker' has died.]

[??? (Cursed) activating....]

"Wha....? Q-Quinn d-d-died?" I stared at the system notification window in disbelief. As soon as I spoke those words I felt my heart throb for a split second before calming down, but my head turned blank.

Magic power shot up from the depths of my very being as if a dam as been broken, I didn't know where the magic power was coming from, but I welcomed it as it cruised through my entire body, I wasn't thinking straight, now I just wanted to see Quinn, I pushed my fingers into something and tore it apart, I didn't even know where I was just a moment ago, what was happening and what I was doing... I just wanted to see Quinn and..... I saw him.

He was there...laying lifeless in the hands of Louie, who appeared to have used his trait berserker, weeping at the sight of the dead..... Quinn. Henry and Arngrim were standing behind Louie with tears welled up in their eyes while Core was bawling her eyes out.

".....huuu...." I breathed out sharply.

"... Q-Quinn?" I called out.

SPLASH (8x)

Before I even realized, I was in front of Quinn's cold body, I knelt as my eyes blurred, I blinked and cleared my vision as tears started to stream out, I reached out my arm to touch Quinn's face, I don't know why I was doing it, but my body moved on its own and soon my palm appeared near Quinn's right cheek, I touched it and felt the cold sensation on my fingertips which seemed to climb up to my whole 'being,' my consciousness started to numb, but I desperately held on.

"Ah...." I weird sound escaped my mouth as I shut my eyes close tightly and breathed in sharply.

"Haa..." I sigh escaped my mouth as my vision continued to blur without my consent, I retracted my arm back and started to search.

I had no idea what I was searching for or who I was searching for, but I desperately needed it... My gaze was drawn to Isha, who was staring at Quinn's body with a lost expression on her face. Before I realised Isha's face was right in front of mine, I reached out my arms and pulled her close for a hug, hoping it would comfort her a little. I had no idea what I was doing, but... I just did.

I don't know why, but Isha seemed small as her head touched my chest, I then started the search again while hugging her slightly stronger because I..... needed to feel something or I knew I would do the same thing I did before I was reborn....

"Haa..." I felt Isha's warmth, but this time we were knelt on the ground, hugging each other while I rested my head on her drenched left shoulder, and it was only then that I realized I was crying so hard that her clothes were already soaked in my tears.

​ ".... And..." I tried to speak, but my mouth and throat were dried as I spoke in a broken, trembling voice.

".... Haa..." I tried to gulp down air, but I felt something stuck in my throat, it felt....

Too painful.

"..... A-and he-here I th... Haa.... thought I cu-cu-could com-comfort y-yu-you....." I said to Isha who was still staring at Quinn, but tears were streaming out of her eyes which is a...

Good sign.

".... T-they s-s-say, one shu-should cry wh-when they lo-lost sum-someone, or th-they would ne-never be able g-g-get over it...." I said with my hands on her cheeks as I forced her stare at me in the eye.

"Pfft, hahahahaha, pffft, hahaha! Yes, this is it! This what I wante...." I heard a man's laughter which brings back very.... Veeeerrrrryyyyy bad memories. (AN: CH03 Intruders (2))

CHOMP

SPLURT

"Grr..."